Identifying your parenting style

The following questionnaire is divided into two parts with fifteen statements each. Part I is designed to help you identify your beliefs about being a parent. Part II focuses on your current home situation. As you read each statement, decide how much you agree with it. Then, on a separate sheet of paper, write the number from 1 to 5 that corresponds to your level of agreement:

  1. Strongly Disagree
  2. Disagree
  3. Neutral
  4. Agree
  5. Strongly Agree

Part I: Beliefs

  1. It is better to give a little ground and protect the peace than to stand firm and provoke a fight.
  2. Children need discipline that hurts a little so that they will remember the lesson later.
  3. Children shouldn’t always get their way, but usually we ought to learn to listen to what they have to say.
  4. The parent-child relationship is like a war in which if the parent wins, both sides win, but if the parent loses, both sides lose.
  5. If parents provide a good environment, children will pretty well raise themselves.
  6. The parent’s role is like that of a teacher who is preparing the child for a final exam called life.
  7. Childhood is so short that parents should do everything to make it a happy time.
  8. Spare the rod and spoil the child is still the best policy.
  9. Children need to learn what they may or may not do, but we don’t have to use punishment to teach.
  10. Whether we like it or not, children have the last word about what they will or won’t do.
  11. If you let children have a pretty free reign, they will eventually learn from the consequences of their behavior what is appropriate.
  12. Children first have to learn that the parent is boss.
  13. Too many children today talk back to their parents when they should just quietly obey them.
  14. If we want children to respect us, we must first treat them with respect.
  15. You can never do too much for your child, if it comes from genuine love.

Part II: Actions

  1. I often have to call my child more than once to get him or her out of bed in the morning.
  2. I have to constantly stay on top of my child to get things done.
  3. When my child misbehaves, he or she usually knows what the consequences will be.
  4. I often get angry and yell at my child.
  5. I often feel that my child is taking advantage of my good nature.
  6. We have discussed chores at our home and everybody takes part.
  7. My child gets a spanking on the average of at least once a month.
  8. My child has no regular chores around the home, but will occasionally pitch in when asked.
  9. I usually give my child clear instructions as to how I want something done.
  10. My child is a finiky eater, so I have to try various combinations to make sure he or she gets the proper nutrition.
  11. I don’t call my child names, and I don’t expect to be called names by my child.
  12. I usually give my child choices between two appropriate alternatives rather than telling my child what to do.
  13. I have to threaten my child with punishment at least once a week.
  14. I wish my child wouldn’t interrupt my conversations so often.
  15. My child usually gets up and ready without my help in the morning.